FIRST DRAFT:
Idea for monologue:
Originally, we were given act 3, so I have decided to keep to this. My monologue will be from the perspective of Mrs Alving. I intend to use some of the actual lines written for Mrs Alving and Oswald by Ibsen and throughout want to highlight several things, including: Light imagery as this features throughout the whole play, going beyond naturalism, ideas of recognition which will hopefully include ideas of hamartia as this is important as decisions effect different things and I want to highlight awareness of Mrs Alving’s decision to return which is the first point of everything going wrong. I also of course want to highlight ideas of Ghosts as this is present throughout.
My idea is to present Mrs Alving having some kind of psychotic episode. She is remembering Oswald and the things he said. Oswald is now dead and she is struggling not only with this but everything surrounding this. I want to highlight expressionism where there was a change to people being spiritually led. I want to express this fear and anxiety throughout and highlight ideas of recognition and ideas of doing the right thing and not actually knowing what is right in situations which are not black and white.
First Draft:
Son of the Sun, Son of Joy, Son of Life
I never asked for it
I never asked for it
I never asked
Everything will burn
Burn in the light
Burn in recognition
Soft
Soft baby of mine
Softening, everything will burn. Shouldn’t be out for long
Take it back, I never asked for it.
Cherry red velvet curtains, how I long for your touch, your comfort, your ability
To restore
Restore to me what the ghosts took
I don’t need you anymore, I need you, I don’t need your helping hand
Haven’t you got your mother to give you a helping hand
Take a great burden off your poor poor poor poor tormented mind
Tormented mind, help me see
The joy of living, what blasphemy
Dawn breaking over the mountains, I can see the sun. Nothing in this world that I would not do for you. Everything will burn.
I can’t get him to come away from the fire. Help me please. My duty? My belonging?
Mother, Mum, Mummy give me the sun please. Mother, please I beg you. You mustn’t scream
I can see you and you think I cannot. I can see you; I always see you. I have no choice otherwise.
You must’nt scream. Take it back. He didn’t take his hat. Into the fire. His hat. Where is it? He didn’t take it.
Would have done no good. I have other things to think about. Can’t get him to come away from the fire. Shouldn’t have been out for so long.
New light. Dawn breaking over the mountains. A deadly feeling of dread. I can’t take it back.
I want it back.
My duty. My ghosts. My Son
Give him the sun.
You mustn’t scream.
PROCESS OF TRYING TO GET IT ON ITS FEET:
When trying to get my monologue on its feet I first wanted to concentrate on creating the Pina Bausch movements. This was incredibly difficult as I wanted it to resonate with not only the character of Mrs Alving but the themes that are presented in Ghosts. I tried several different sequences and recorded myself doing them to try and discover which ones I thought would work best this was a much more lengthy process then what I originally thought it would be. It was very difficult to encapsulates both the emotion and themes which I wanted was to present such as regret, remorse and the theme of the past coming to haunt your present. After several different videos and several different mash ups of movements I finally came to a sequence which I was happy with this included Mrs Alving presenting her hands and bending down and being pulled up by her own arms this was to represent her trying to hide away from the past but always cruelly being faced with it.
As well as trying to find a right movement sequence for my piece it was also very difficult to not only learn my lines but to convey them with conviction and in a convincing manner -surrounding factors also made this more difficult, such as being in my own space and my children wanting to get involved.
The rehearsal process was not only difficult but time-consuming as it is was imperative for me that I put forward a piece of work which I was not only happy with but a piece which I thought encapsulated the emotions present within the play and within an accurate Pina Bausch whilst all the while staying true to my original intentions and writing of the piece.
The thing I found most difficult was joining of the Pina Bausch style and trying to keep the realism of my piece- as I wanted my piece to be convincing that within it Mrs Alving was actually having this psychotic episode. I didn’t want it to look amateur but I also wanted it to be equally balanced in terms of the representation of the themes. Pina Bausch’s pieces are very fluid and dance like and I found this difficult to not only emulate but to present while reciting the lines of my monologue.
To combat these issues I just continued to practice and try different things.