A classmate of mine told me this movie made him cry and I laughed at him. I just found it funny, and to be honest, a little bit of toxic masculinity never hurt no one. Okay, maybe it has, but that isn’t the point. Maybe I’m just being harsh, in theory this movie is sad, a young man dying from either starvation, dehydration or being poisoned. Or all three. And for what it’s worth, it’s decently written and shot. My issue is the pretentious main character, ‘Oh look at me I’m so rich, I graduated damn near at the top of my class! Let me set fire to all my money and go live like a hobo because I’m so much better than all this!” We f*cking get it, mate. F*ck off. There’s nothing I hate more than a self-indulgent, up his own arse main character who ends up the most annoying thing about the movie he’s supposed to be the hero of. Tell you what, Mr “Supertramp”, there ain’t nothing heroic about dying from poisonous seeds. I should probably sign off by saying something good about this movie. I liked how it was his sister narrating instead of some lonely love interest he left behind; it gave the narrative even more of an emotional weight and didn’t feel cliché at all. Also, has William Hurt ever played a likeable character?

Pretentious d*ckhead, btw.